We have a new neighbor. The house to our west has been for sale for a few months and it must have sold last week because the new neighbor moved in over the weekend. Apparently he is a single guy, late 20's, with a loud old truck and some kind of boat.
Tonight Hank had to go to work. On his way he called me and told me the new neighbor was sitting out in the front yard drinking a beer. He then followed this with a quick, "There is no need to wave or go over and introduce yourself when I am not home." My immediate response was, "I would never do that" with which he followed "Yeah ya would, how do you think you and I ended up where we are today." So OK, point taken. But, as long as he doesn't need to borrow a mower, Hank is safe. Kidding of course.
My only concern is he is going to have some wild party and wake up the kids. Man, I am getting old in a hurry.
26 comments:
I can't stop laughing. So...what if you need to borrow a cup of sugar or an extra beer or something and it just happens to be while Hank's gone? Then what do you do? This is a dilemna. I guess you have to resort to an Ashley method. Get out the binoculars and start spying!
What if you are working on a project and Hank doesn't have the right tool? Or what if the hardware store is closed and you need a screw?
What if you don't have enough cream for your coffee and you need cream!?
Or a bug gets stuck in your eye and Hank isn't around to help you and the kids aren't home??
Or worse, you get a Charlie Horse and it needs rubbed out by stong hands immediately or you might loose the use or your leg?
Hank would understand extenuating circumstances like those.
I think we are going to need to see a picture of the new neighbor.
Before you ask him to help you "oil your crank", I think you need to give us all a visual.
A night vision pic (I assume you have that capability) will do.
okay, very curious as well. that would only be 3 doors down from me.....I NEED to know, or see that night vision picture.....
-a
This post is so funny... and will be moreso in few months when you and Hank are bff's with this new single neighbor... and he reads your blog!!! :-)
I assume he's H-O-T! I agree w/ Sarah and Amber... need pic... :-)
Because I am a wanna be spy, I can assist you with your night vision goggle needs. I can personally fly them in, if needed. I mean I wouldn't want you to have to do this alone...what kind of friend would I be if I did that?
But what if Hank is gone fishing and you need a rod?!?
Or
What if the new neighbor starts a garden and needs a hoe?
Questions to ponder.
Well, if he were my lesbian UPS driver you could just ask him to leave any packages in your box.
--by the way, Ashley you REALLY have night vision goggles?
The reasons for me to like you grow daily.
I must admit that after Jack and I took our almost nightly ice cream/slush trip to the DQ we did a drive by of the new neighbor's house. At this point the curiosity is killing me. I gotta see what he looks like! I will assume he is not Mexican or Hank would have already escorted him back to the border.
White is so boring, I am hoping he is at least Indian (Native American). Now I can come up with an Indian name for him.
What if you are baking a pie and need some dingleberries?
What if you need a hotdog for your buns?
(Jamee) So far, he is bald with glasses, thats all I know. I am going to have to go incognito to get a pic.
Ashley, the night goggles may be handy.
(Hank) Hey Chuck, Jamee and I are thinking about buying that land off of Bart next to you guys, maybe Arnold will need a place to grow his tomatoes.
I have no idea what that means. I am still busy trying to think of more one-liners.
Arnold Harmon, remember the tomato delivery neighbor who would bring Holly tomatoes at 10:00 at night.
Surely Jamee's neighbor could provide that service for everyone
--by the way, I sure did not picture him bald and with glasses.
More like long flowing braided hair wearing a feathered head dress, suede pants, and no shirt
Oh yeah! I forgot about him. What if you are making breakfast and need sausage for your eggs?
What if you are making soup and need a bone?
cfarley,
ebunton would like to know if you sent any of these messages from your blackberry, in your boxers, from your home office?
Most all of them. And I can't stop laughing at myself.
cfarley,
Do you go to work, close your door and start logging on to peoples' blogs? Do you actually insure anything or anyone...do you even work?
What do you mean? I am working right now. In fact, I think I will raise somebody's premiums.
Hfarley says:
Oh yeah he goes into his home office and "logs" on if you know what I mean...He insures it too!
So what if their new neighbor needs help logging onto his computer? We can see how computer savy Jamee is, she would be the obvious choice to help him.
hfarley, I think we all know what you mean by "logging" on!
What if the neighbor has an itch he needs scratched? Is Jamee not allowed to help a brother out!
What if she wants to play pool and needs balls?
What if you are craving Hostess and need a Ding Dong?
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